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How To Get Ahead in Advertising
(Director: Bruce Robinson)
My Rating: 2.5 out of 5 pens.

An advertising executive confronts his darker side in this oddball comedy from 1988.

Dennis Bagley (Richard E. Grant) knows his fellow Englishmen like the back of his hand, or so he thinks. His sneering cynicism, coupled with a legitimate creative talent, has placed him near the top of the advertising game, and he claims he can sell anything to anybody. But when he finally meets his personal Kryptonite, it comes in the form of an ordinary pimple cream. Suddenly, inexplicably, he’s utterly blocked while staring at a looming deadline. He can’t even think about the product without cringing at the thought of gigantic, disfiguring boils….

Guess what happens to him next.

Not only does he develop a boil the size of a baseball on his neck, but the thing seems to be talking to him, whispering evil things even as Bagley experiences a change of heart about his advertising ethics. Bagley wants to tell the truth and nothing but the truth about his clients’ products from now on — but the boil has other ideas. Is Bagley mad, or has his unmitigated greed to sell, sell, sell really developed a mind of its own?

I won’t pretend this a great film; it sort of totters to a conclusion (with one final speech from the boil about how it’s the advertising industry’s job to tell people what they want) instead of resolving properly, and the sheer weirdness of a sentient talking pimple will turn some viewers off. (And yes, the special effects people are extremely, er, helpful in this regard.) Aficionados of cult films or offbeat humor will get some good laughs out of it, and the performances of Grant, Rachel Ward as his long-suffering wife, and the supporting cast are committed and energetic.

The most interesting thing about the film, to me, is the question it asks about the nature of human greed versus the sincere desire to help and inform our fellow beings. Bagley is torn — he wants to reform, to advertise ethically and help customers actually make choices, but his corrupt side still lusts for the power that comes from dictating and swaying human behavior. (At one point the boil actually plots to drum up interest in the pimple cream by making acne a popular craze, with the intention of then swerving public opinion so that the horrified victims will rush to buy pimple cream.)

Personally, I’ve had pretty good luck when it comes to writing ad copy for products and services I can believe in, for clients who sincerely care about what they’re offering. But I know in my bones that someday, sooner or later, that zillion-dollar contract will come to my door, with a moral price tag to match. Will I live up to my own expectations — or will I develop a skin problem? Stay tuned.

I’ve always been interested in the history of inventions and innovations. Computer history is particularly fascinating to me, partly because of the surprisingly long timeline involved. Computing extends back to the ancient abacus and the Greek Antikythera, a mechanic “prediction machine” dating back at least 2,000 years.

Yet even with this legacy of computational aids, the vast majority of computing had been done strictly by hand well into the 19th century — in fact, the word “computer” originally applied to the people who actually sat before computational tables performing endless manual calculations to try to get these tables as accurate as possible. It was a brutal, never-ending task, and one that Charles Babbage decided to mechanize. His Difference Engine No. 1, designed in 1821, employed a series of gear wheels in a decimal system to calculate values. Unfinished during his lifetime, the design has been replicated by modern engineers and works exactly as predicted nearly 2 centuries ago. There’s even a LEGO version!

What’s this got to do with marketing? Frankly, it was the name that struck me. Babbage used the term “difference” in the mathematical sense, of course, but we marketing professionals revere the word for, ahem, different reasons.

Finding your unique brand, your niche, is a critical factor in a successful marketing campaign. You have to figure out exactly what makes you stand out from your competitors. What new or original qualities does your company bring to the table? Is it a matter of background, of experience, of values, of power, of access, of personality? What makes you different?

Then once you’ve isolated that quality, what process have you created to communicate it to your target market? What media devices are you employing and how do they integrate into a unified branding effort?

What’s your “Difference Engine?”

Okay, it isn’t your blog, it’s my blog (though I do hope to attract readers from California to the New York Eye-lands). But I’d like to make it as useful, informative and interesting a blog as possible, so I’m enlisting your aid.

Do you have a particular question about copywriting or its role in a marketing campaign? Do you have an illuminating anecdote or experience to relate about your own efforts to promote your business? Or maybe you’d like to offer input on some aspect of writing in general.

I hope to make this blog a lively landing point for valuable and fascinating information in these areas, so I invite you to put on your thinking cap and email me with any topics you’d like to see covered here. General blog comments are always welcome too, so don’t be shy. (Except for spammers. You guys can be shy. Thanks.)

So whether you’d like to regale the blogosphere with your wisdom or you just have a great URL to recommend, feel free to send it on for future consideration as a blog topic or link.

While businesses are all a-Twitter with social networking and various other Web 2.0 methods for connecting with each other, don’t forget about the most simple and time-tested form of networking — meeting people.

Don’t get me wrong, I think online networking is a great thing. I’m especially fond of targeted applications such as LinkedIn, which allows me to focus on building my B2B network. Ultimately, however, all these applications are merely tools for developing new bonds with real, breathing human beings; otherwise you’re just adding numbers to an imaginary playpen. Who are the people behind the screen names? What do they care about? How can you help them, and how can they help you?

Time to take to the field.

The chamber is just the beginning. Every business owner has been urged at some point to join their local chamber of commerce. These organizations can bring handsome rewards if you’re willing to commit a certain amount of time and effort to aiding the chamber through committee involvement and event support. But if you’re unfamiliar with networking events, a chamber meeting can seem like no man’s land — or worse, like the playground at a new school where everybody is having fun except you. If you’re the gregarious type, you’ll brush this feeling off in about 5 seconds. But if you feel like fading into the wallpaper, you may want to get some practical training and experience….

Referral networking groups give you that training and experience. Generally they meet every week (some meet monthly) and members are allowed to introduce themselves and educate each other on their target market and their idea of a perfect referral. The meeting often includes a spotlight session on a particular member, a group discussion, or an educational moment about networking techniques. And of course there’s always some time devoted to open networking, which is really where you learn how to talk to other business owners — and more importantly, how to listen.

Why is listening such a big deal? Because successful networking is all about helping others. The credo of BNI, for example, is “Givers Gain.” If you make a genuine effort to help other business owners and refer potential customers to them, they will be happy to return the favor. Put others first and you’ll be taken care of. It works in customer service, it works in networking, and it works in life.

I’m a member of the BNI Referral Masters Chapter of Austin and we’re about to host a huge “Joint Visitors’ Day” with a sister chapter to introduce 100-plus local businesspeople to BNI and/or referral marketing in general. (Contact me if you’d like more info on this.) I also belong to Your Local City, a Round Rock-based group that is working on becoming a national phenomenon — they’ll even let you start a chapter in your own town if you ask nicely. And I attend some Austin-only groups such as National Business Exchange (NBX). Wherever you are, there’s a referral group waiting to do business with you.

I encourage you to seek out the referral groups in your area, visit a few of them, and see which one is the best fit for you. And bring plenty of business cards — you’re going to need them!

Are you an expert in your field? Would your business benefit from making the world aware of that expertise? Are you ready to become an “authority?”

Writing informative articles is a great way to get there.

Why an Article?

We live in an age where we can get instant expert advice on anything and everything, thanks to the Internet. (We can get a lot of schlock, too, but that’s food for a future article.) If I want to know the best way to remove red wine stains from upholstery, or an incorrect entry from my credit report, or a deadbeat roommate from my apartment, I can get a dozen authoritative answers on the subject almost immediately by doing a web search. We are conditioned to look to the experts for the answers — and the experts are providing those answers in the form of online articles. How can we recognize them as authorities? Well, just look at all the stuff they’ve written!

See how it works? You become known as an expert only when you express yourself that way on the biggest possible public stage.

Also, in today’s cutthroat business world you need to stand out from your competitors. By sharing your unique experiences, insights, and point of view with your target market, you are branding yourself and your business. We all prefer to do business with someone we feel we know on some level. Let the world get to know you!

What Do I Write?

If you’ve been in business for a while — or in life, for that matter — you’ve gained a plethora of experiences and perspectives on what you do and whom you do it for. Everyone has some special insight or other to share with an audience that truly wants to hear it. I have such expertise, and so do you.

Your expert article can take a variety of forms:

The List. “5 Ways to Jump-start Your Business.” “7 Reasons You Should Write an Article.” You get the idea. People love lists because they’re easy to read, digest, and remember. Don’t be surprised to learn that your list is being bookmarked or downloaded for future reference by appreciative readers.

The Story. Do you have a great anecdote or powerful learning experience to share with your target audience — something that made you stop and take stock of your business or even your life? Your wisdom has value!

The Overview. Introduce strategies and concepts to your readers in a kind of introductory essay. Your idea doesn’t have to be an earth-shattering new truth; you can discuss tried and true business tips and still make an impact. We all gain knowledge in our own good time, through paths we find ourselves. For every reader who’s already been there and done that, there are others out there saying “Wow, what an eye opener!” Your article can be that eye opener.

The Appeal. Do you need to alert your readers to an issue you feel passionately about, to stir them into action or warn them away? Your urgent information could make a huge difference in someone’s life or work. Instant credibility!

The types listed above are only a few of the forms your articles can take. Experiment for yourself, and read others’ articles to get a handle on what they’re doing. But whatever form you use, be sure to include a link back to your company website to help direct new traffic toward your business. They’ve read the expert’s words; now they can contact the expert!

What Do I Do with My Article?

The nice thing about articles is that they can be multi-purposed for a variety of audiences and media. Here are just some of the ways you can get your expertise in the public eye:

Online Directories. There are countless websites devoted to categorized directories of articles. I’d wager that many of the articles you’ve stumbled upon in a search were found on an article directory such as ArticleDirectory.com or EzineArticles.com. Google “article directory” and you’ll see what I mean. In most cases, submitting to these directories is as easy to filling out a simple form, pasting your article’s text into a field, and hitting “Submit.” There are even some software programs that can auto-submit your article to multiple directory sites.

Your Mailing List. Send your article out to your existing customers as part of your email newsletter or email-blast campaign — and make sure you ask them to forward it to their friends and colleagues!

Your Blog and Website. Blog entries tend to come in two flavors, anchor posts and updates. While updates can be simple tidbits of news or recommended links to other blogs, anchor posts are — you guessed it — articles. An anchor post is usually 500 to 1,000 words of genuinely valuable, authentic original content, so your expert article can make a perfect anchor post for your blog. Your website’s News or Resources page is another great place to post.

Print Media. For all the attention paid to digital media, we still read printed journals, newspapers, and magazines. Do you have any contacts in the local media? Does your favorite trade journal accept submissions from guest authors? Can you contribute to a colleague’s newsletter? Get your name in print!

But I Can’t Write!

No problem — hire a copywriter!

Sorry, I couldn’t resist. But it’s true that ghostwriting is commonplace in the article-writing world. I’ve ghosted many an expert article, relying on my client’s depth of industry knowledge and overall vision of the article’s theme. Even if you are highly skilled and comfortable with writing your own article, subbing it out can save you valuable time and brainpower that might be better spent on running your business.

Ultimately, how you get it done doesn’t matter. Whether you do the whole thing yourself or get some help along the way, writing an article can be the first step toward positioning yourself as an expert in your field.

And who doesn’t want to hire an expert?

What is a freelance copywriter, anyway?

Recently I met a lady at a networking meeting. I told her I was a freelance copywriter, and she was most impressed: “I’ve never met a copywriter! Copywriting must be great fun. Is this a good town for a copywriting business?” Et cetera. Then she asked, “So, how exactly do you help someone apply for copyright?”

Sometimes I have to do a bit of educating when I discuss my profession — I can’t just throw the word “copywriter” out there and assume everyone knows what I’m talking about. So I’ll refer to myself as a marketing writer, or I’ll just say, “I write for businesses.” And that’s a pretty good definition. A copywriter is anyone who makes a living writing stuff for businesses. Print ads, brochures, web content, articles, technical documents, video scripts–you name it, a copywriter writes it.

Many copywriters prefer to specialize, reasoning that no one can be equally knowledgeable or enthusiastic about everything. Even so, there’s usually some bleed-over between one niche and another. For example, I specialize in high-impact, short marketing pieces such as onesheets, brochures, flyers, and web pages, and I work primarily with small businesses and entrepreneurs. But I also get a steady stream of requests to write more in-depth items, such as press releases and informative articles, and I’m usually happy to oblige.

Why would you hire a copywriter?

Same reason you do anything in your business — to make money. A copywriter can help you make more money in several ways. First, if you have a professional writer creating your marketing and sales materials for you, obviously those materials are more likely to lead to sales a bunch of “boiler plate” cobbled together by an amateur. You also profit in a less obvious way — by increasing your productivity. What’s your billable time worth, to you and to your company? How much of that valuable time do you lose by grappling with a writing assignment instead of doing your job or running your business? A writer can take that burden off your hands and give you a better product, faster and more-cost effectively.

What should you look for in a copywriter?

Credentials. Make sure he’s legitimate. Look for writing samples, references, and testimonials from satisfied customers. Do your homework the same way you would when hiring any independent contractor.

A good fit. Talk to the writer and try to get a feel for whether this relationship will be smooth sailing or stormy seas. And try to determine the writer’s specialty, if any. No writer is perfect for every job, regardless of skill or experience. If you run a funeral parlor, for instance, you’ll want to think twice before hiring a writer who specializes in humorous bumper stickers. ‘Nuff said.

A detailed plan. Get a bid letter from your prospective writer discussing the project’s schedule, milestones, payment expectations, and quality assurance. Make sure rewrites are available, either included in the price or as an optional additional purchase.

Make sure the rates are reasonable, whether they are expressed as flat fees or as hourly estimates. Shop around to get a range of quotes. Rates can vary wildly, depending on a writer’s experience level and reputation. That’s why an unreasonably LOW rate should send up a red flag. Why is this writer not asking for–or deserving of–professional rates? Are you dealing with a legitimate entry-level writer who is trying to build a portfolio, or have you caught a “bottom-feeder” who just wants to grab some fast money at an inexperienced buyer’s expense?

A good copywriter is worth his weight in gold. Once you find a reliable pro who produces quality writing, meets deadlines, and is a joy to work with, hang onto him. You’ll have a valuable business partner who can help you take your company to the next level — one word at a time.

Oh, and in answer to that lady’s question, send your copyright applications to the U.S. Copyright Office in Washington, D.C.